The World Anti-Doping Authority set the kot among the golubi this week with its report outlining systemic doping in Russian athletics. The accusations required a calm, rational response. What we got was the head of Russia’s anti-doping agency, Nikita Kamaev, who sounded like he’d been dipping into the banned substances himself. “I reckon some must…
Category: Friday Funnies
Rupert’s conversion on the road to Twickenham
Somewhere in the past week, Rupert Murdoch has become a rugby union fan. While I don’t follow his Twitter feed religiously — there is food to be digested after all — I’ve never known him to tweet about sport. Yet since Monday, there have been three in a row about rugby. Including one sticking the…
FIFA’s problems solved. Honest.
Stop everything. I think I’ve found the new FIFA president. With candidates falling like flies ahead of the February 26 vote, caught up in corruption probes of their own, there has emerged a person with exactly the qualities you’d expect in the boss of soccer’s ‘governing’ body. Here are some of his recent quotes —…
Flying Dutchman crashes to earth
He scored one of the goals of last year’s FIFA World Cup, a leaping horizontal header that earned him the nickname The Flying Dutchman and many a social media meme. This week, the Netherlands found themselves inexplicably struggling to qualify for next year’s European Championships. Two goals down against the Czech Republic and needing every…
Would the last person to leave FIFA please turn out the light?
Here’s a picture of FIFA’s executive boardroom. Yes, it would probably be right at home on a Star Trek set. But the point is, it’s empty. You see, after a night of the long knives wielded by FIFA’s ethics committee (sorry, that phrase still cracks me up), there’s no one left to run the joint….
FIFA goes into crisis management mode
It’s the news we’ve all been waiting for. FIFA boss Septic Bladder is under criminal investigation. In the scheme of the shenanigans that passes for football administration, it’s not the biggest misdemeanour we’ve heard about. But it embroils the key players of soccer’s ‘governing’ body — Septic himself and the bloke who, until now, was…
All’s fair in love and rugby
When the Rugby world Cup comes around, it’s always good to make fun of the All Blacks when you can. Which turns out to be pretty easy when they’re playing away from home. The All Blacks have only claimed the Webb Ellis Cup when the tournament’s been played on their turf. And Japan’s shock win…
Kiwis fans play the wimp card
The Rugby World Cup is here. And if the All Blacks are anything like their fans, they’ll crumble like a chicken stock cube. In the land of the long white band of cotton wool, a petition is doing the rounds calling for a 10am start to the working day because of all the early morning…
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