The festive season can be hard on relationships. But it seems this Christmas has claimed the greatest love affair of them all.
Tag: FIFA
Santa spills the beans
In a special treat for our readers, we have obtained a rare interview with Santa as he prepares to harness the reindeer for his annual global pilgrimage. Perhaps due to lack of sleep or an excess of Mrs Claus’ famous eggnog, Santa has blown the lid on some of the more unusual requests he has…
The egos have landed
His fiefdom is rife with corruption, he himself is under criminal investigation and two World Cup bids get stinkier by the day. But according to Vladimir Putin, this is all good reason for FIFA president Septic Bladder to be awarded the Nobel Peace Prize. Yes, in Vlad’s mind, Septic deserves the same honour that has…
Sports stars and their big mouths
Forget the investigations over bid corruption and concerns over the abuse of construction workers. David Beckham reckons we should all support the 2022 Qatar World Cup. “Whether it’s corrupt or not, those countries have been chosen. People need to get behind that,” Becks told Radio Times. “It’s about bringing football to new countries. They should…
Cheer up, lads, you won the Davis Cup
It’s the first time the Poms have won the Davis Cup in 79 years. And it’s not like they win a lot of hardware in the sporting arena*. So you’d think the Poms could muster some excitement about taking out tennis’ ultimate team trophy. But Andy Murray says there’s no point having a victory parade…
Guess who doesn’t know the rules of soccer?
“Australia was a little bit offside.” Interviewed for the ABC TV program Played, this was how FIFA boss Septic Bladder explained Australia’s failed bid to host the 2022 World Cup. Which suggests Septic needs a crash course in the rules of soccer. Because you have to be on the actual field of play — and,…
From Russia with love
The World Anti-Doping Authority set the kot among the golubi this week with its report outlining systemic doping in Russian athletics. The accusations required a calm, rational response. What we got was the head of Russia’s anti-doping agency, Nikita Kamaev, who sounded like he’d been dipping into the banned substances himself. “I reckon some must…
Rupert’s conversion on the road to Twickenham
Somewhere in the past week, Rupert Murdoch has become a rugby union fan. While I don’t follow his Twitter feed religiously — there is food to be digested after all — I’ve never known him to tweet about sport. Yet since Monday, there have been three in a row about rugby. Including one sticking the…
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